Archives: The Funny Bone

The Inner Monologue of a Toddler Using a Smartphone

Baby on Phone 3

What babies are REALLY thinking while they drool all over your phone… AFTER THE JUMP!

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Why the Airport is Heaven on Earth

Pink Airplane

Airports get an unfair reputation – but besides the foul-smelling feet in 15D and the accusatory TSA agent, I’m a little confused why. Sure, having to re-mortgage your house to pay those baggage fees is annoying…and traveling with that friend who requires horse tranquilizers to board a regional shuttle is a challenge.  Oy, and your mom who is so nervous about losing her boarding pass that she buries it in her giant purse at the bottom of the abyss and then panics that she’s lost it EVERY 5 MINUTES.

But, hey, all that aside, the airport is essentially an adult playground. For starters, it is absolutely the best excuse to …MORE AFTER THE JUMP!

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How to Procrastinate

Procrastination

Here at The Wonderist, we’re no strangers to procrastination station.  For us it’s almost a competitive sport – like how many hours of Mad Men can I squeeze in before I absolutely have to write my next post?  Can I fill a jar with jelly beans and correctly guess how many are in it before I do that next interview?  You get the drift.

If you’re anything like us, you might be a little bored of procrastinating in the same way every day – so please enjoy our top 60 ways to procrastinate TODAY – because if there’s one thing that’s easy to do on time, it’s procrastinate! Procrastinate with…taco cat – after the jump!

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How to Get That Internship

 

Beyonce Dancing

Summer is fast approaching and your schedule is looking a bit…well, empty.  Freedom feels SO good, but it can also feel a bit… …More – after the jump!

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No Diet Day

Junk Food Taxi

How’s your diet going?  You know, that one you promised to start in January and then again in February and again in March?  Yeah, us, too.

Even if you haven’t really gotten started, we think you deserve a break just for thinking about it.  Did you know there’s this thing called “No Diet Day” in May?….Yeah, it’s mysteriously absent from our calendars, too.  This should obviously be right up there with Thanksgiving, the most hallowed binge-eating holiday of all.  We just might circulate a petition to get No Diet Day its own 4-day weekend.

So, please, put down the baby carrots and fall off the food wagon with us, as we run with manic enthusiasm to the nearest grocery store.  Here is a list of items that you 100% need to have if you plan on doing this right: …AFTER THE JUMP!

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The Best Break-up Playlist

The History of Men Moving On

It’s springtime, folks, and that means the end of cuffing season! Time to ditch the paramours who refused to commit this winter for the promise of fresh summer flings. Only you can decide whether to approach this new season of opportunity with giddy optimism or over a gallon of ice cream.

The one thing we know for sure is that CDZA’s “History of Men Moving On” is the perfect soundtrack for cutting ties this spring.  CHECK IT OUT AFTER THE JUMP!

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The Sequel

goonies

“Never say die.” Those words were made legendary to young adventurists by what 1985 classic movie? FIND OUT AFTER THE JUMP!

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The Snack Situation

I Want Snacks.jpgIn my pursuit of a new job, I’m not looking for the usual trappings – salary, insurance, vacation days.  Oh no.  I’m focused on a REAL priority – the free snack situation.

Companies all over the U.S. are going hard on satisfying the munchies – offering some of the most competitive snack benefits ever seen outside a 7-Eleven: Check out the insane snack perks at Dropbox after the jump!

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Open Letter: to NYC Moms

Stroller Photo

Dear Women All Over New York Carrying Strollers Up The Subway Stairs,

How do you do it?

I think I would throw in the towel after one trip during rush hour and head to temple to beg God to give my newborn the power to walk.

Those strollers are huge, ridiculously so, and just about the most annoying thing a person could have to maneuver onto a packed subway car.

How do you not resent that beautiful little face staring up at you while you use all of your bicep strength to carry a bed-on-wheels up a flight of unforgiving concrete stairs? I resent people for so much less!

I must applaud your dedication to your child’s comfort, as well as your commitment to supporting public transportation. Oh, and to the women with double strollers for multiple babies – just stop. You are clearly angels come to Earth and the world needs you to use your powers for a greater good.

Adam thinks he’s a writer.  He kindly requests that you pretend he’s a sleepwalker and don’t wake him up from this delusion. You can follow him on Twitter at @FakeAdamCecil.

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Is it Stealing?

Hotel Soap

Anyone who’s been backpacking knows that your bag is always heavier on the return-trip after being stuffed with cheap cigarettes and tacky souvenirs for coworkers you don’t really like. I’ve long-since given up on the tacky souvenirs (which just end up at the back of bookshelves anyway). I now opt for a different kind of souvenir– the kind you don’t generally pay for… See what we mean…after the jump!

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