My, what big hands you have…
Since the dawn of time, people have been trying (and failing) to get each other into bed. But not even hormonal teenagers have been doing it quite like the ancient Greek and Romans, who – according to this entertaining read – were “perennially inventive.” (Reason #582 the government should be funding time travel research.) Most amusing, however, is what they used to turn themselves OFF – you know, that “erection-withering substance, fresh lettuce.” I knew I didn’t like salads for a reason. The produce aisle of America is going to take a big hit when this blog post goes viral.
After a few quick searches to see what popular aphrodisiacs are today, I was totally surprised to find how bland they are. Pumpkin pie? If that were true, Thanksgiving Dinner would be a pretty awkward affair for everyone. Leafcutter ants? Yup, never met an ant I couldn’t resist (chasing with a magnifying glass in the sun). Avocado? To eat or to rub all over someone, I’m not sure.
So I polled some of my girlfriends for a more relatable list, and here are the PG-13 things that turn them on. I’m curious – what are yours?
- Wanting the same kind of soda as a date at the movie theater – especially if that soda is cherry coke
- A fearless emotional vocabulary
- TV in bed together – extra points if he wants to watch Bravo
- Big mechanic’s hands
- Rapid-fire wit and humor
- Sleeve tattoos (that don’t contain the names of any ex-girlfriends)
- A sense of rhythm
- Playing big spoon, little spoon
- Grocery shopping together
- A cocked eyebrow
Leave your turn-ons in the comments section below!